I created a short video to explain one of the most foundational concepts we all need to know (and remember) to create a career and a life we love. It is a deceptively simple principle, but a really crucial one.
It is often THE difference to feeling happy and content, or feeling unhappy, to moving forward or staying stuck.
This concept may be self-evident to some, but for most of us, we tend to sub-consciously think our circumstances cause us to feel different things.
Circumstances are things like other people’s words and actions, our living environment, our bank balance, the weather. Things outside of us.
We tend to say things like –
- “My boss made me mad.”
- “Work is stressing me out.”
- “What a depressing day” implying that the weather is what is making us depressed.
But the reality is that our thoughts about what our boss said are making us angry. Our thoughts about our workload are what are causing us to feel stress. Our thoughts about the overcast sky and rainy day are what make us sad.
Think about it –
- Not everyone thinks that an overcast sky and rain are gloomy – a lot of people think that’s cozy. Still others are grateful for the rain to alleviate a drought.
- Not everyone thinks a lot of work is stressful. Many think that having a lot of work makes the day go by fast.
- Many people can have the same interaction or the same experience and have different takeaways from it.
A layoff can lead to worry for one person, but another person can view it as a great gift – to be freed from a job they don’t enjoy and get some severance too.
Our thoughts about the situation are always what lead to our feelings. And this is terrific news because we have control over our thoughts, and therefore over how we’re going to feel.
There will still be many situations that we will want to feel sad or mad. We don’t want to feel happy that a loved one died, for example.
But it is so empowering to understand that for many situations the negative emotion is optional.
And when we’re freed from the negative emotion we typically respond and act in more effective ways creating much more desirable results.
If you’re interested in learning more about this concept, check out my online program, THRIVE.
To your success –